Remembering Rynn
Leave a Memory - Google Form
This form is intended to capture the life of a trans person who made their home in North Dakota for a time.
Information
Scheduled Times to Grieve
Misc
I hold this page as a historian, suicide prevention advocate, and trans community leader who wants to represent those we've lost. I claim no ownership over any of this material and will share with close friends, families, and promote any other place memories are also stored. Also, will take any recommendations to make this better, including art or designs! If there are any errors or there are things on this page, please let me know! [email protected]
This form is intended to capture the life of a trans person who made their home in North Dakota for a time.
Information
Scheduled Times to Grieve
- Memorial Services - Fri, October 18th at 5:30 PM at the Indigenous Center
- Tristate Transgender - Sat, October 19th at 4:00 to 6:00 PM at Red Raven's Black Cat Art Studio
- Faye's Online Memorial/Tribute - Sunday, Oct 27th at 9:30 PM
Misc
I hold this page as a historian, suicide prevention advocate, and trans community leader who wants to represent those we've lost. I claim no ownership over any of this material and will share with close friends, families, and promote any other place memories are also stored. Also, will take any recommendations to make this better, including art or designs! If there are any errors or there are things on this page, please let me know! [email protected]
MemorieS
Danica Roem, journalist and politician once said, “I never say ‘trans but, always trans and.’ Because it’s like, no, I don’t hide who I am. People know exactly who I am here.” This quote makes me think of Rynn because she was unapologetically who she was, a beautiful trans woman.
I met Rynn in the fall of 2021. She came to a Project RAI event and spoke to our parent group. Project RAI supports queer youth ages 3-14 while also providing resources to their parents. She, and other trans people spoke to the group that night about being trans, activism in North Dakota, and understanding what support to trans people looks like. I had a great time learning about who she was and her spark immediately sucked
me in as someone who I wanted to know.
I continued to engage with Rynn at local events, rallies, and groups. She was ready to help, offer advice, perspective, and guidance to anyone who needed it. I don’t want to say that Rynn was an accidental activist because she saw the timeline we were living in, culture wars on queer and trans folks, and knew that her lived experience could benefit others. She took up the fight for trans rights selflessly and always made herself available to anyone who needed her.
Rynn and I found each other speaking at many of the same events. Her spark and her sass propelled me to do my work better. Those who knew Rynn will remember how sassy she was. She always seemed to have some sort of smart response to anything and everything happening around her, typically with a curse word thrown in there for good measure. The thing I remember about Rynn and her activism was that she was about solutions and was not the one who got bogged down in the noise and the hate even though we all knew she was very much affected by it. Her strength and resolution through tough times was inspiring and much of the time was what kept me going.
Winter Pride 2023 Rynn and I were asked to speak at the drag show down at the VFW, our mission was to bring awareness about the priorities of that legislative session and how folks could fight against it. She was so excited and got to the VFW like an hour early so we could have a good table in the front. Rynn hardly sat down all night, she fluttered around the room talking to everyone, telling them who she was, why she was there, and told everyone she liked their outfit. Her positive light was not to be dulled because she was going to overpower anyone who tried to bring her down. We had a blast that night and it’s a memory I will always treasure.
When I think of Rynn, I think of power. Not in a patriarchal sort of way, but in a way that showed everyone she knew exactly who she was. She lived authentically, and in her whole truth. Rynn joined an aerial arts class and loved it. She always tried to get me to go saying how much fun it was and how great it made her feel, and I always found an excuse not to go. I didn’t want to go because I wasn’t brave enough and scared that I would fail, my own insecurities got the best of me. Not Rynn. Rynn was brave, kind, not judgmental, authentic, inspiring, and caring. She wanted those around her to be the same; live the way she was able to live. I wish now I had taken her up on that aerial arts class.
We all know that living such an authentic and outspoken life made Rynn a target of people who refused to understand her. She needed to leave our state and this country because she wanted to live somewhere where she could exist as her most authentic self. Rynn landed in Finland and was hopeful for a new beginning that would bring her peace. Each picture and social media post showed a gorgeous, happy woman exploring her new country and documenting the asylum process. As her friends and chosen family back home cheered her on, as she engulfed herself in the Finnish culture. She went to parties, got an apartment, and a job. Rynn was able to meet new folks that embraced her for who she was deep down and loved her just as we did.
The news of Rynn’s death has shaken our community to the core. When I heard, I was at a loss for words trying to process my thoughts and feelings. I took this week to deeply think about who Rynn was, what she has done for our community, and how her activism spread world-wide, the last thing Rynn would want us to do is sit frozen in sadness and despair. Do you need to start a non-profit like TRANSport? No, but she would want us to stand up and do something.
Jane Goodall said “It is important to take action and to realize that we can make a difference, and this will encourage others to take action and
then we realize we are not alone, and our cumulative actions truly make an even greater difference. This is how we spread the Light. And this, of course makes us all even more hopeful.”
Take the time you need to remember and grieve our friend Rynn, but when you are feeling stronger, put those memories to work with activism. Write letters to the editor, volunteer at organizations that support queer and unhoused people, vote. She would want us to use whatever skills, talents, and abilities we have, to advance our work in equity for queer and trans people. We must keep Rynn’s legacy alive by standing up to the injustices we face from local, state, and federal lawmakers. She fought hard for those she knew and didn’t know while she was alive, we need to take up that fight and keep fighting now that she is gone.
To my friend Rynn. I miss you terribly and am incredibly sad thinking I will never see you again. I hope you can see all the friends who have gathered here today to celebrate you and you can see how loved you were. I am working to understand that you were not able to stay here, and I hope now you are free to be exactly who you were meant to be. We love you, and we will forever remember you. Rest in power Rynn. If you or someone you know is having thoughts of suicide or self-harm, please call or text the suicide life and crisis line at 988. If you are local to Fargo-Moorhead you can call 211 and speak to someone at FirstLink.
I met Rynn in the fall of 2021. She came to a Project RAI event and spoke to our parent group. Project RAI supports queer youth ages 3-14 while also providing resources to their parents. She, and other trans people spoke to the group that night about being trans, activism in North Dakota, and understanding what support to trans people looks like. I had a great time learning about who she was and her spark immediately sucked
me in as someone who I wanted to know.
I continued to engage with Rynn at local events, rallies, and groups. She was ready to help, offer advice, perspective, and guidance to anyone who needed it. I don’t want to say that Rynn was an accidental activist because she saw the timeline we were living in, culture wars on queer and trans folks, and knew that her lived experience could benefit others. She took up the fight for trans rights selflessly and always made herself available to anyone who needed her.
Rynn and I found each other speaking at many of the same events. Her spark and her sass propelled me to do my work better. Those who knew Rynn will remember how sassy she was. She always seemed to have some sort of smart response to anything and everything happening around her, typically with a curse word thrown in there for good measure. The thing I remember about Rynn and her activism was that she was about solutions and was not the one who got bogged down in the noise and the hate even though we all knew she was very much affected by it. Her strength and resolution through tough times was inspiring and much of the time was what kept me going.
Winter Pride 2023 Rynn and I were asked to speak at the drag show down at the VFW, our mission was to bring awareness about the priorities of that legislative session and how folks could fight against it. She was so excited and got to the VFW like an hour early so we could have a good table in the front. Rynn hardly sat down all night, she fluttered around the room talking to everyone, telling them who she was, why she was there, and told everyone she liked their outfit. Her positive light was not to be dulled because she was going to overpower anyone who tried to bring her down. We had a blast that night and it’s a memory I will always treasure.
When I think of Rynn, I think of power. Not in a patriarchal sort of way, but in a way that showed everyone she knew exactly who she was. She lived authentically, and in her whole truth. Rynn joined an aerial arts class and loved it. She always tried to get me to go saying how much fun it was and how great it made her feel, and I always found an excuse not to go. I didn’t want to go because I wasn’t brave enough and scared that I would fail, my own insecurities got the best of me. Not Rynn. Rynn was brave, kind, not judgmental, authentic, inspiring, and caring. She wanted those around her to be the same; live the way she was able to live. I wish now I had taken her up on that aerial arts class.
We all know that living such an authentic and outspoken life made Rynn a target of people who refused to understand her. She needed to leave our state and this country because she wanted to live somewhere where she could exist as her most authentic self. Rynn landed in Finland and was hopeful for a new beginning that would bring her peace. Each picture and social media post showed a gorgeous, happy woman exploring her new country and documenting the asylum process. As her friends and chosen family back home cheered her on, as she engulfed herself in the Finnish culture. She went to parties, got an apartment, and a job. Rynn was able to meet new folks that embraced her for who she was deep down and loved her just as we did.
The news of Rynn’s death has shaken our community to the core. When I heard, I was at a loss for words trying to process my thoughts and feelings. I took this week to deeply think about who Rynn was, what she has done for our community, and how her activism spread world-wide, the last thing Rynn would want us to do is sit frozen in sadness and despair. Do you need to start a non-profit like TRANSport? No, but she would want us to stand up and do something.
Jane Goodall said “It is important to take action and to realize that we can make a difference, and this will encourage others to take action and
then we realize we are not alone, and our cumulative actions truly make an even greater difference. This is how we spread the Light. And this, of course makes us all even more hopeful.”
Take the time you need to remember and grieve our friend Rynn, but when you are feeling stronger, put those memories to work with activism. Write letters to the editor, volunteer at organizations that support queer and unhoused people, vote. She would want us to use whatever skills, talents, and abilities we have, to advance our work in equity for queer and trans people. We must keep Rynn’s legacy alive by standing up to the injustices we face from local, state, and federal lawmakers. She fought hard for those she knew and didn’t know while she was alive, we need to take up that fight and keep fighting now that she is gone.
To my friend Rynn. I miss you terribly and am incredibly sad thinking I will never see you again. I hope you can see all the friends who have gathered here today to celebrate you and you can see how loved you were. I am working to understand that you were not able to stay here, and I hope now you are free to be exactly who you were meant to be. We love you, and we will forever remember you. Rest in power Rynn. If you or someone you know is having thoughts of suicide or self-harm, please call or text the suicide life and crisis line at 988. If you are local to Fargo-Moorhead you can call 211 and speak to someone at FirstLink.
Eulogy - Kristin Nelson
Ryan and I were in a state LGBT2+ advisory board together which launched a Facebook friendship since we didn't live in the same city. As an advocate who often gets burned out on the fight in a red state, I admired her for being an example of continuing to fight, even when life is hard. We ( society) do a disservice to lights like hers. I'm sad she's not here anymore. My first memory of her was her asking tough questions of a speaker and pushing back against the North Dakota nice we're all so used to being. I loved that so much. A woman after my own heart . Assertive and caring and vulnerable with who she was. It's such a rare quality.
From J.
Rynn’s presence in the community was complicated but god it sucks so so bad to lose a trans sister in that way. I didn’t know her very well but I had worked with her on the Pride Collective and hung out in spaces with her. Not many trans women take active/leadership roles like she that in the community activism space because of the added risk of our visibility and that was something that I appreciated and was motivated by. My heart is very heavy for my sisters and community members who knew her in a more intimate capacity.
From Pen
Rynn and I did not part on good terms. At her passing, on top of the grief of loss, I feel the regret that we will never get the chance to reconcile. Rynn gave a lot for this community. I wish we could have worked more together.
From Katrina
I didn't know Rynn well, but I can't stop thinking about her and wishing I could have helped her. I find myself getting emotional periodically throughout the day (I'm crying now, in fact). Several years ago, I wanted to re-start the Kaleidoscope group at the Pride Collective for my transgender/non-binary child but was struggling to get things going. Rynn, Lilly, and Am at the Pride Collective all reached out to help, although Rynn was very vocal and supportive. She was such a positive spirit that I immediately felt connected to her. I friended her immediately on Facebook and was always so happy to hear from her when she posted there. Oh, Rynn. Why? I'm sorry if I didn't do enough or say the right things when you needed it. I'm heartbroken for you, for the pain you must have been feeling. I'm heartbroken that you struggled because you were and remain a valuable and meaningful human being that was beautiful, kind, and generous, and a fighter for good.
From Marianne
This post was inspired by an amazing human that we sadly last. Althrough are gone, gone, they will always live on in ours heart. 🩵💜 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hey everyone, I want to remind you that you matter. Life can feel overwhelming, and it’s important to know that you’re not alone in this journey. Many people face challenges, but together we can create a supportive community. Take the time to check in on each other. A simple message or call to your loved ones can mean so much. Let them know you care, that they are loved, and that you’re here for them. It’s crucial to foster an environment where everyone feels safe to share their feelings. If you or someone you know is struggling, please don’t hesitate to reach out for help. Here are some valuable resources: Trans Lifeline: 1-877-565-8860 (a peer support service for the transgender community) Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386 (a confidential support service for LGBTQ youth) North Dakota Suicide Prevention: 1-800-233-1737 Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength. Let’s lift each other up, celebrate our identities, and work towards a world where everyone feels valued and supported. 💜 #YouMatter #MentalHealth #LGBTQ #TransSupport #CommunityCare #SupportEachOther #SuicidePrevention #endthestigma
Hey everyone, I want to remind you that you matter. Life can feel overwhelming, and it’s important to know that you’re not alone in this journey. Many people face challenges, but together we can create a supportive community. Take the time to check in on each other. A simple message or call to your loved ones can mean so much. Let them know you care, that they are loved, and that you’re here for them. It’s crucial to foster an environment where everyone feels safe to share their feelings. If you or someone you know is struggling, please don’t hesitate to reach out for help. Here are some valuable resources: Trans Lifeline: 1-877-565-8860 (a peer support service for the transgender community) Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386 (a confidential support service for LGBTQ youth) North Dakota Suicide Prevention: 1-800-233-1737 Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength. Let’s lift each other up, celebrate our identities, and work towards a world where everyone feels valued and supported. 💜 #YouMatter #MentalHealth #LGBTQ #TransSupport #CommunityCare #SupportEachOther #SuicidePrevention #endthestigma
From CJ
I am heartbroken at the recent news. Rynn Willgohs you helped me become the person I am today. I will miss you greatly and I hope we meet again someday. Rest in peace my friend.
From Lilly
Messages of Self Care
Gallery
Details, dates, ReferencesAll citations used during remembering rynn tribute
If there are any errors, pleases let us know so we may correct it! [email protected] 1)Song - Zara Crystal - performing The Old Therebefore
Wilgohs, Rynn, Feb 23rd [video of Drag Show], Facebook. https://www.facebook.com/100090135176732/videos/768920857898575 Event: Sat Feb 18th - https://www.facebook.com/events/546704610759031/ Location: Fargo VFW Club 3)Fargo City Commission (2023, March 6th)4) No Author, (2024, Oct 13th) “Rynn Willgohs 1972-2024” High Plains reader.5) Wilgohs, Rynn, Feb 23rd [video of Human Rights Summit], Facebook.
13) Home | TRANSport. (n.d.). https://www.2023transport.org/
15) Van Der Stad, M. (2022, November 28). Fargo transgender women to flee US, form group to help others do the same - InForum | Fargo, Moorhead and West Fargo news, weather and sports. InForum. https://www.inforum.com/news/fargo/111922-n-ff-transport 16) Zoledziowski, A. (2024, July 27). Some trans people are preparing to flee the US and seek asylum abroad. VICE. https://www.vice.com/en/article/trans-people-fleeing-us-seek-asylum/ 17) Villarreal, D (Jan 15th, 2023). A trans woman founded a group to help trans people leave the U.S. due to rising hate - LGBTQ Nation. https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2023/01/trans-woman-founded-group-help-trans-people-leave-u-s-due-rising-hate/ 18) Matt Walsh. (2023, January 11). Trans activists are fleeing the country | Ep. 1094 [Video]. YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rUBZzGPWVdM 19) Rathod, J. (2024, April 3rd). Some trans people and others in vulnerable populations are looking to leave United States - Baltimore Sun. https://www.baltimoresun.com/2023/04/03/some-trans-people-and-others-in-vulnerable-populations-are-looking-to-leave-united-states-guest-commentary/#ed=rss_www.baltimoresun.com/obf/rss 20) Baxter, H. (2023, May 4). ‘18 more months, baby. Then I’m in Iceland’: The group helping trans people to leave the US. The Independent. https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/transport-transgender-asylum-iceland-lgbtq-leave-america-b2332698.html 21) Hagen, C. (2023, August 30). North Dakota’s transgender laws prompt some to move elsewhere - InForum | Fargo, Moorhead and West Fargo news, weather and sports. InForum. https://www.inforum.com/news/north-dakota/north-dakotas-transgender-laws-prompt-some-to-move-elsewhere?auth0Authentication=true 22) Zoledziowski, A. (2024b, July 27). Trans people are avoiding whole U.S. states to stay safe. VICE. https://www.vice.com/en/article/trans-people-avoiding-travel-to-us-states/ 23) TNM Interview with Rynn Willgohs. (2024, April 28). RRCC. https://redrivercreatives.com/tnm/spring-2024/tnm-interview-with-rynn-willgohs/ Rynn's timeline
1972 - Born (later suggested they found out they were intersex) 1985 - Experience conversation therapy, later said it lasted 6 months and took 35 years to heal from 2008 - Moved to Fargo From Denver March 31st, 2021 - Rynn Start Transitioning Winter of 2021 (Oct/Nov) - Rynn Joins PCCC Pride Board - sets out to revitalize programs Nov 11th, 2021 - Mother shows up to run youth group, brings hope to Rynn Dec 14th, 2021 - Rynn meets with head of YMCA to discuss trans policies Jan, 2022 - Rynn Joins the BeYouth Health Advisory board Jan, 2022 - Rynn starts connected with Project Rai Jan, 20th, 2022 - Rynn has first experience with being targeted, deactivated original fb Jan 25th, 2022 - Rynn starts exploring city level fair ordinances Feb 15th, 2022 - Rynn presents to Project RAI about being trans and activism April 15th, 2022 - Police are called on Rynn, after she attempted to cancel an appointment at St. Sophies. May 5th, 2022 - Rynn joins a weekly informal trans protest downtown that occurs for weeks June, 2022 - Rynn encourages everyone to share what inclusive things they saw in businesses for trans people as an experiment to make people thinkabout how trans folks have to navigate safety July 12th, 2022 - Rynn identifies increase levels of harassment this week Nov 28th, 2022 (Inforum) TRANSport - Work begins to start TRANSport Jan 10th, 2023 (Vice) TRANSport Jan 11th, 2023 (Matt Walsh) TRANSport Jan 15th, 2023 (LGBTQ Nation) TRANSport Jan 19th, 2023 (Daily Beast) TRANSport Jan 19th, 2023 (Miami Herald) TRANSport Feb 7th, 2023 (The Humanist Report) MattWalsh Breakdown Feb 13th, 2023 (Faye What? Show) TRANsPort Live Interview Feb 16th, 2023 - Rynn spoke at Human Rights Comission Feb 18th, 2023 (VFW/Winter Pride) How to Fight for Trans rights Feb 23rd, 2023 Rynn spoke at Human Rights Summit with RRCATS March 6th, 2023 - Fargo Human Rights Commission Meeting for fighting Trans Bills April 10th, 2023 (Vice) TRANSport May 4th, 2023 (The Independent) TRANSport May 7th, 2023 (Business Insider) TRANSport March 23rd, 2023 - TRANSport website launches March 28th, 2023 - Public Talk with community leaders from Grand Forks (BJ Armani) May 24th, 2023 (VICE) TRANSport June 7th, 2023 (InForum) Rynn and others protest Burgum’s Presidential Rally August 30th, 2023 (InForum) TRANSport June 2023 - December 2023 - Rynn identifies struggles with mugging, mental health, and addiction causing her so step back during this time. Dec 2023 - April 21, 2024 - Attempting to live abroad, at some point changed from iceland to Finland, due to country of origin being an automatic denial from iceland. Dec 2nd, 2023 - Identified having left the country April 3rd, 2024 (Baltimore Sun) TRANSport April 21, 2024 - Rynn Identifies a post in a local group blowing up into culture war issues, followed by harassing comments from local folks in Finland. April 28th, 2024 (The Northern Mirror) Rynn Bio May 29th, 2024 - MTV Finland - Rynn’s Person Immigration Plea July 7th, 2024 - Rynn posts about her final appointment being pushed back a month. August 2nd, 2024 - identifies being assaulted and robbed Oct 2nd, 2024 - Rynn’s Final FB post about final asylum hearing and saying she is doing well Oct 8th - died by suicide according to Finnish authorities Oct 13th - Obituary officially put in HPR - first public announcement of her passing Oct 17th, 2024 - news media reports on Rynn’s Passting Oct 18th, 2024 - Memorial Services - 5:30 PM at the Indigenous Center Oct 19th, 2023 - Tristate Transgender offered their meeting time for public to grieve Oct 26th, 2024 (Jim Shaw) Farewell to Rynn Nov 14, 2024 National Media Covers her death by suicide |
Centering and Help
Local Help and Crisis Lines
Suicide Prevention and Postvention Resources
Night of Hope
Harbor Health Initiative LGBTQ+ Directory
- If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. The 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: Call or Text 988 or chat 988lifeline.org
- Non-Emergency/Support: Firstlink Help Line: Dail 2-1-1 or Text “Zip Code” to 898-211
Suicide Prevention and Postvention Resources
Night of Hope
- Video of over 40 people in North Dakota, many queer and trans people, talking about what gives them hope
Harbor Health Initiative LGBTQ+ Directory
- Every affirming provider for therapy, hormone therapy, or any other queer related health needs
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Psychologist Letter Part 1
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Psychologist Letter Part 2
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Breathing Exercises
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Mindful Compassion
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Safe Spaces Exercise
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